Father’s Day Part 2 – The Family’s Revenge

(If you don’t care about the trainwreck that is my family, you can skip this post. It’s really intended for an audience of one – but as I *AM* a blogger and it’s my nature to air dirty-laundry online…here goes)

Wow – I forgot that my sister reads my blog from time to time. I also apparently forgot that she’s absolutely batshit crazy. A lifetime of drugs and alchohol and pretending the real world doesn’t exist will do that to you.

After my last post she sent me a pretty terse email regarding our father, plus she didn’t like the fact that I characterized her little 20-something-foot airstream as “crappy”. (She called it “Classy” – on what planet is a mobile-home classy? Pauline? You *KNOW* classy maybe you can answer that question)

Sis – a few points if I may. (And it’s my blog, so yes, I bloody well may)

Any house with wheels on it is crappy. It’s a refuge for people who can’t stand to feel pinned down, but as a result it’s also a refuge for people who don’t want roots, who don’t want to make connections and have people know them.

You *LEFT* when you were thirteen. Split. Bailed. Vamoosed. You say it was because mom was insane going through menopause. Well that’s understandable. My wife says that her mom was pretty insane during hers as well. Of course her father was trying to kill her mom too, so maybe it just goes with the territory. You can spend days and days telling me what mom/dad were/weren’t like when you were a kid, but the fact of the matter is you weren’t there when *I* was there. (Sometimes you were pretty close by, living with your stoner friends in some house dad bought so that you wouldn’t be homeless, and a further stain on his reputation) You played other people’s music, got high, freeloaded, played the occasional paying gig, but never once created something yourself, preferring to live off other peoples’ hard work and creativity.

You accused me of being a Marxist/Socialist. Well, first off, if you had a lick of education you’d know that those are two almost completely different ideologies. I’m a centrist democrat or a left-leaning independent, depending on how you look at it. But to an illiterate redneck anything to the left of center is evil and must be destroyed.

You are the picture of a hypocrite for your belief that “Socialism” is a bad thing. You spent DECADES of your life on the public dole. You took every handout you could. And I’m aware enough of your earning history to know that you haven’t REMOTELY come close to paying it back. At this point you’re only counting down the years until you’ll be eligible for Medicare/Social Security. (though you’re in for a shock when you get to that age, your payout at the end is directly related to what you put into it, and you’ve spent so much time avoiding real work that it means you’ll qualify for enough to keep you from having to eat dog-food, but that’s about it.)

You are exactly the type of person the right-wing types freak out about when it comes to welfare, saying that “providing for people just encourages them to beg for the handouts.” So are you going to turn down Medicare? Are you going to turn down Social Security? No, probably not. Your body is failing from years of abuse, drugs, hard drinking, and letting losers beat on you. You need that handout, and even though you’ve not paid NEARLY as much as I have into the system, you’ll sure as hell take from it without batting an eye.

I don’t care that you do, I think the system is there for people who need it, even you. I *DO* care about hypocrisy, and in taking that hand-out you are the biggest kind of hypocrite.

But here is one handout you don’t need anymore. And in truth, by your logic, I’ve been remiss in allowing you to keep it this long. For close to two years I’ve been carrying your cellphone bill because your credit sucked so badly you couldn’t even get a phone. Well I think I’m going to take a page from the right-wing handbook. You might try one of those pre-paid cellphones, if the wireless cartel in Valdez allows them, or you might have to go without. That’s what you righties think that people should do right? Just do without if you can’t afford it?

Effective immediately you are hereby cut-off. Feel free to pawn the phone, I don’t ever expect to see it again, and I’ll never again mention again the few hundred dollars per year I’ve spent keeping that phone active for you. Plus the money I’ve lent you that I’ll never see again, plus the money you STOLE from me by using my FedEx account without permission to ship stuff to Alaska when you ran away from your last, best chance at a real life.

See how good that feels? You should be thanking me for forcing you to stand on your own two feet. You don’t need handouts, right?

If you’d like to send back the computer I gave you you can do that too, but at this point it would cost you more to ship than it’s worth.

Secondly, your role in my kids’ lives.

You don’t have one. Period. You don’t get to abdicate your responsibility as a parent and then swoop in and pretend to be grandma. I was hesitant about allowing you into the house, given the fact that to this day you can’t seem to give up the drugs or smoking long enough to hang out with them. You are the worst kind of bad influence they could have. What could you have taught them? That ignoring the law is ok when it’s pot but not when it’s illegal immigration? Dad taught me lessons like that, and it took a 3 year state-paid-vacation for me to realize that mom/dad had taught me completely wrong. They both used to tell me “I dont care what you do, just don’t get caught.” Is that really the lesson we need to teach our kids?

It’s sure as hell not the lesson I’m teaching mine. Mine learn “The law is the law and you may not agree with it but it’s the law for a reason.” I think they’ll have a lot better luck navigating through their adulthood than I did.

That’s the sad part.. You’ve given up any relationship you could have had with them. For what, so you can go back to growing your own pot? That’s *REALLY* mature. Running away to a state that houses nothing but people running away from the real world? (Hawaii is that as well without snow-shoveling.) It’s not like you would ever be able to make the trip out here, and I’m sure the only view my kids are going to get of Alaska is going to be from the deck of a cruise ship. And that’s not bloody likely, there are many better places to see with culture and learning and seeing things that matter in the world.

I’m done. This is good-bye. I’m sorry it didn’t work out, but to a one every member of this family has turned out to be absolutely nuts so truthfully it’s in my kid’s best interest to sever all ties, just in case crazy is contagious.

Take care of yourself. I’m hoping you’ll figure it out and turn your shit around, but I’m not going to hold my breath – your last best chance for normal died when you left Phoenix.

And don’t try to comment on this post. This is my blog and I’m allowed to have the last word. You want one of your own, get your own damned blog.